July 1, 2015


I went to Philly last weekend to visit my cousin, Hilary. It was a long overdue trip- one that I'm impressed we could schedule, considering how busy we both are.

I got in late on Friday because I locked my keys in my car again (!) and I had to wait for my spare set to arrive. Because of that, I took off late and hit a little traffic around Newark. Oh, Newark, I hate you. You smell terrible. There, I said it.

Friday was for catching up (and really good burgers and pulled pork sandwiches, followed by a drink at speakeasy!), and Saturday morning was for a spin class- yes, I've become one of those people who travel and still work out. Quite amazing, no? We got back to her apartment mid-afternoon, took our sweet time getting ready (which involved trying on ~15 different outfit options), and walked outside to find rain...a lot of rain- sideways rain, to be exact.

After stepping outside and realizing our umbrellas were almost completely useless, we abandoned any idea of walking around, and hopped into Hilary's car, and drove ourselves further into the city, towards the promise of shopping and food.

I love Mexican food. I think I've said that once or twice or three hundred times before, but it's one of my favorite things to eat. Tacos, nachos, burritos, guacamole- I don't care, give me all of it. I said this recently while on a date, and the guy responded with two words: how boring.

How boring! How boring??

I resisted every urge to say, "Well, I'm sorry that your mother raised you as a vegetarian, and you've spent the last 10 years trying to make up for that by eating things like chicken liver." Because, well, I'm trying that whole being nice thing, you know? But I really wanted to say that. I wanted to say that and then turn on my heels and run towards the nearest Moe's.

I'm getting off track.

Margaritas and two words that should always be said together: nacho pizza.

Hilary and I took shelter at a Mexican restaurant called El Vez. We had originally planned to go to place called Tequila, but our reservation wasn't until later, and we found ourselves hungry and in the need of a stiff drink. After spending two hours getting ready, only for our hair and outfits to be ruined with one good gust of wind and rain, we figured we deserved one.

After we ate, we headed across the street to do a little shopping. And by shopping, I mean, we wanted $4 chocolates but needed to hit a credit card minimum, so Hilary treated herself to a new Alex and Ani bracelet in order to do so.

It's all about sacrifice, isn't it?

To further sacrifice our hair/outfits, we walked a handful of blocks in the opposite direction of our car to a place called...wait for it...Big Gay Ice Cream.

I could ring my shirt out by the time we got there. Our shoes were soaked and squeaking as we walked toward the counter. But the ice cream? Oh, the ice cream was so so so so worth it. Even if everyone working there, along with the other patrons, stared at us like we took a shower in our clothes before deciding to go get ice cream.

We debated meeting up with some of her friends later that night, but chose to stay in with beer and pizza (and fries! To quote Hilary, "If there's a minimum, I'm ordering fries." We agreed that will be the title of her first memoir), and watch a couple episodes of True Detective instead.

There's a quote from Maya Angelou that goes, "You can tell a lot about a person by the way they handle three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."

I think we handled that rainy day pretty damn well, don't you?

June 23, 2015


READING: My co-worker just let me borrow of her copy of Cheryl Strayed's novel Torch. Since I loved Wild and Tiny, Beautiful Things, I'm hoping to fall in love with this, too. I have to do a book haul soon- maybe once I finish this book?

EATING: Lots of quinoa and steamed broccoli. Not nearly enough pizza. Oatmeal every morning. Handfuls of trail mix.

WATCHING: Well, I cruised through the latest season of Orange is the New Black in a cool 4 days. Anyone else finish it? What did y'all think? Now I'm back to watching Entourage, and also a lot of YouTube. It's been a while since I binged on YouTube- does that mean I'm growing up? Say it ain't so.

LOOKING FORWARD TO: Two words - RED ROCKS. Kelsey and I are headed there in a few weeks to see The Avett Brothers (shocking, I know). I've only been to Colorado once, and it was for work, so I didn't get a chance to really explore. Anyone in the Denver area have any recommendations for places to eat? Shop? Get into a little trouble?

THINKING ABOUT: Those two escaped convicts. Have you heard about them? They've been on the run for two and a half weeks, and the prison they escaped from is roughly 140 miles North of where I live. I'm fascinated by this man hunt. I'm also convinced I will look out my bedroom window one morning and see them standing in the woods behind my house.

June 19, 2015

Mixtape No. 12

1. Shovels & Rope // The Devil is All Around
2. John Prine // All the Best
3. Frank Turner // Tell Tale Signs
4. Langhorne Slim // Colette
5. Neil Young // Heart of Gold
6. Cory Chisel and the Wandering Sons // Never Meant to Love You
7. Of Monsters and Men // Slow Life
8. Matt Haeck* // Wonderful Wild Tennessee Child
9. The Avett Brothers // If It's The Beaches

*he played a show at my house last December- his album is on Spotify and iTunes, so check it out!

June 12, 2015

My Week in Charlize Theron Gifs

Sunday: After Kelsey and I finished 3 hours of spinning for the Tour de Cure.

Monday: Bocce was canceled, so I got to have tacos for dinner after all.

Tuesday: After I chopped my hair!

Wednesday: When I explained to my co-workers that I'm following The Avett Brothers around for the weekend.

Thursday: My 5pm disappearing act because I have Friday AND Monday off.

Friday Morning: Me to my cats as I leave for the weekend.

June 10, 2015

How to be 28

You spend each Sunday meal prepping for the week. It’s a new thing, but even after four weeks, you still enjoy doing it. You feel proud of yourself for sticking with it, and question what other small changes you can make.

You listen to Neil Young’s “Heart of Gold” on repeat until you fall asleep. You realize it’s a song that you can listen to a million times over, but until you hear it at the right moment in your life, it has no meaning. And then it does, and you can’t stop. 

You go on dates with two different men on consecutive nights. You struggle to be likable; to be soft and open. A few nights later, you quickly befriend a married man. You realize you’re more comfortable around men who are not interested in sleeping with you.
This bothers you, but forgive yourself for it nonetheless.

You get on the floor and play with trucks, and bugs, and trains with your nephew. You watch your parents watch you do this. You wonder if they worry you’ll never have kids of your own. You push the thought to the back of your mind.
You watch Eat, Pray, Love in its entirety for the first time. You’ve started and stopped both the movie and the book countless times, and haven’t made it through either until now. You throw the remote across your living room when you find out who she ends up with.
And then you pick it up, shut the TV off, and put yourself to bed.
You realize it’s been 6 months since you had diet soda or fake sugar. You can’t remember the last time you had a headache.
You Google when Mercury is in retrograde this year. This is information that’s important to you now.
Two weeks later, you forget the dates, and Google them again. You read your horoscope for the current retrograde cycle, and although it clearly states to not get a makeover, you decide to cut four inches of hair off anyway.

Because you're tired of waiting: for things, for people, for life to happen.

June 8, 2015

A message.

I'm working on speaking my mind.

About what I expect from someone, what I want from someone, what I need from them.

A clear indication of what's going on in my mind, so that there's no guessing, or muddled feelings, or mixed signals. 

And not just when I'm pissed off, or annoyed.

Because that's always been easy for me, you know? I've said before that anger comes very naturally to me- it's the one emotion that I'm comfortable with. But even so, verbalizing that anger in a productive manner takes practice.

And telling someone how you're truly feeling when it comes from a place of sadness, instead of anger- well, that takes practice, too.

A lot of practice, if you're me.

So when I finally worked up enough courage to send a message to someone who has been on my mind more often than not lately, I was scared. My hands were shaking and my heart was racing, but I knew what I had to do, what I had to say.

I was met with silence.

A quiet reminder that personal growth is just that: personal. Not meant for him, but for me. And I'll continue to grow within the peace of knowing that I'll never have to wonder, "What if I had just said something?"

June 3, 2015

Mixtape No. 11

1. Florence + The Machine // What Kind of Man
2. Nikki Lane // All or Nothin'
3. Brandi Carlile // Hard Way Home
4. The Cranberries // Dreams
5. Fleetwood Mac // The Chain
6. Nicole Atkins // It's Only Chemistry
7. Grace Potter & The Nocturnals // Here's to the Meantime
8. Fiona Apple // Across the Universe
9. Stevie Nicks // Edge of Seventeen